Happy Thoughts?!?!

I'll post today about some happy thoughts, although things aren't 100% happy in the Barnes household. Matt's Aunt Annie - his mom's sister - passed away yesterday following a tough battle with lung cancer. I'll try and post more later about Annie....not today.

Katie's picked up a couple of new habits over the last couple weeks. First, the word "NO". Its not a new word in her vocabulary. She's just started using it more often. I'm really hoping that's just a phase and that it will pass. Time will tell.

The second thing she's picked up - wearing my shoes! This little habit is SOOO much like her mommy. There are a bunch of pictures of me as a little toddler wearing my dad's cowboy boots. No, I'm not joking. The boots came all the way up to mid-thigh on me. I wish I had a scanned copy of the pictures to compare with the videos below of Katie. Up to this point I'd say Katie's personality is more like her daddy than me.....but sometimes I see glimpses of her mama in her.

Bye Bye, So long, Good riddance

Its official - the Helmet is GONE!!!! We got the word today from Katie's neurosurgeon and her orthotics specialist. Its strange. Matt and I've been waiting for this day for months, but now that its here we don't quite know how to react. Should be an interesting transition....

Off to School

Katie started "school" this week. I like calling it "school" instead of daycare, although I'm not sure what the difference is at 18 months of age. They do have a specific curriculum they follow with a letter of the week, number of the week, and sign language sign of the week - plus music, art, and other activities.

School/Daycare has been a big debate in our house for the past couple months. My mom's time in Richmond is coming to an end in April. I'm so sad to see her go for many reasons. First, she's my mom and excluding Matt - she's my best friend. The selfish side of me loves having her here in Richmond. I also love the bond that she and Katie have developed from spending so much quality time together. I hate to see anything change that - though I know when mom goes back to Woolwine it will be different.

Matt and I considered hiring a nanny, but that option has its drawbacks as well. Katie needs some socialization, and she will get that from school - but she wouldn't from a nanny. I have all the usual concerns.... How often will she be sick? How will she adjust to the separation from mommy, daddy, and nana? Will she thrive in such a different environment, or suffer some developmental setbacks? Is school the best option for her? Is 18 months too early to start? My list of questions is endless. But, sometimes you've just got to give things a try.

So, that's what we are doing....giving it a try. This week Katie attended 2 days from 9-12 AM. On her first day she cried for the first few minutes, but shortly after we left she was happily playing with new toys and new kids. On Day two, she was a little more tentative, but didn't cry at all. Unfortunately, she's had some trouble going down for naps this week. We can't tell if its related to the transition to school - or if its related to the 2 teeth she's currently cutting.

Next week Katie will be attending school 4 days a week. Its going to be interesting to see how it works out. I'm hopeful that her 2nd week will be as good as the first!!

The pictures for this post are from her first day of "school." Mommy and Daddy's big girl!!! :-) (Sniff, Sniff).

Perfection and Pity

Strange blog post title....and its a bit different from my norm. Usually I like to brag about how wonderful things are with Katie and how fantastic she is doing. Katie is wonderful, and an absolute blessing in my life. But she's not perfect.

From my earliest dreams of what parenthood would be like - I didn't imagine having a sick child. I know that sounds both selfish and naive - which I realize now - but its the truth. I never thought we would have to face surgery at 7 weeks, multiple EEGs, MRIs, and innumerable heath issues and doctors appointments.

Oh - and the helmet! I personally have gotten so used to the helmet that I often don't think about if/when its on/off. Then we go out in public with the helmet on......and I'm immediately reminded. Some people don't stare - but some nearly break their neck turning around to see what's "wrong" with our little girl. Sometimes we get looks or comments of pity. Those have to be the worst for me. I don't react very well to pity. That's probably because I'm a prideful person by nature. Part of it comes from the fact that - despite her helmet - Katie's a happy, beautiful, developmentally normal child. But all people see is the helmet.

If there is one truth in life - its that we ALL have flaws. Some physical and easily visible to the passing eye.....some not so easily seen. Katie may not be physically perfect, but she is perfect for me. Health issues, helmets, surgeries and all - I wouldn't trade anything in this world for being her mommy.

I grieve for Katie that she hasn't had a more "normal" early childhood. I wish there was something I could have done to prevent her from developing craniocynostosis and congenital scoliosis - avoiding surgery at 7 weeks, and the helmet for over a year. But, that wasn't the cards God dealt us. I can only hope that we've taken the right steps, made the right choices medically and that long-term things "normalize" for her. That's what I pray for now...

Matt was proof-reading this post and asked me "What prompted you to blog about this? Did someone say something/do something to you recently in public?" I said, no its just something I've wanted to share. Most of our friends have been fortunate to have "healthy" kids. But a few, like us, haven't had an easy path. I guess this post is for all the moms and dads who struggle with the "imperfections" of our children.

To end things on a lighter note - here is an amusing picture of Katie screaming. She was a little annoyed that I wouldn't give her the camera. Ha! I guess in some ways, she is a TOTALLY normal toddler, pitching a fit when she doesn't get her way. :-)

18 Months

Today is Katie's 1/2 birthday! Its been such a nice weekend and Matt took the day off so he isn't going into work tonight. I asked him if he took the day off for Katie's 1/2 birthday, or for the Super Bowl. He said "What do you think?" I said I don't think you even realized it was Katie's half birthday when you put in your vacation request. HA! :-)


Anyways, here is Katie's 18 month update. We don't have her check-up with the pediatrician until February 14th - so the weight and height statistics will have to wait another week.

1. Katie's speech and language skills are coming along. She's added several new words over the past couple months to include baby, wow, water, papa, down and Thank You (tank yu). She also likes to make a whole series of animal noises. Some of the sounds are make believe - some are legit. For example, her dog sound is "woof" but her lion sound is so strange I can't even describe it. Its definitely NOT a roar! :-) Probably her biggest accomplishment over the last 3 months is putting 2 words together. She can says "hi dadda", "hi mamma", "hi nana", or "hi baby" - so I think that counts (right??).



2. Body Parts - Katie can identify the following body parts: eyes, ears, nose, mouth, checks, tongue, teeth, head, hands, feet, toes, and knees. We are working on elbows, shoulders, and chin.



3. TANTRUMS!!! I was under the mistaken assumption that tantrums weren't supposed to start until the terrible two's. Boy was I wrong about that one! ha! Katie will actually throw herself in the floor and scream if I don't give her what she wants (like going outside). I try my best to just ignore the tantrum and at this point they are relatively short lived. Let's hope they stay that way.



4. Teeth - Katie has cut almost all of her teeth. She is still missing 2 eye teeth and one bottom tooth. I'll be so grateful when all her teeth are in - teething is no fun.



5. Its official...she likes LEGOS! :-) Over the last couple months, Katie started taking an interest in legos. She likes to put the blocks together, take them apart, then put them back together again. Over and Over and Over.



6. She can kick a ball and throw it overhand - though she does "throw like a girl." HAHA! :-)

Things we need to work on:

1. Using a spoon. Katie is pretty good at using a fork, but is really pretty bad at using a spoon. Yogurt days are a mess if I let her feed herself. I often feed her because I can't take it. I know its counter productive to her own development when I feed her....but I can't stop myself. She gets frustrated with using the spoon and results to eating yogurt with her hands - I think you get the picture.

2. Puzzles. Katie has excelled at the typical gross motor skills (i.e. walking, running, and climbing). But, her fine motor skills aren't developing as quickly. Some days she does really well with puzzles, other days she struggles.

3. Separation Anxiety!!! Katie is extremely attached to mommy, daddy, and Nana. Even when I leave her in the church nursery she flips out. Some weeks its okay, but this weekend they had to come get me before church service was over. Katie will start daycare this week (only part time initially), so I'm hoping the separation anxiety will get better.

Unfortunately this is a picture-less post for now. I'll update this one with a couple of pics and the physical statistics a bit later. Just want to get some of these milestones down on paper.